Tuesday, June 27, 2006, 7:31 am
As the second month slips by...
I don't even think she realizes she made the wrong decision.
Wow. Maybe i had been giving her too much credit. Or myself.
I suppose i believed she was really in love with me. But if she was, she wouldn't be able to just 'delete' me from her life. So quickly. Just because someone showed her attention. Because he made her feel the way i made her feel. Someone who could make her tingle.
And it's funny how it works when relationships end. The best person in the relationship becomes the big loser... and the weak one gets the prize of getting to crawl into someone else's bed.
She's not in love. If she has any remnant of a soul remaining... what she did to me will eat away at her like a cancer. She gave up on us because the distance was making it hard... and because someone else showered her with affections who wasn't so far away.
And she cannot even tell me. She cannot bear to face me, to talk to me... it is easier if she just erases me from her life.
For now.
Being as close as we were for ten years... being as intimate as we were for the last three... wow, she really thinks that she's into something better now?
Or maybe it's that something better is into her.
I suppose it is good to learn how much she cares. How willing she is to endure any crisis. What 'true love' actually means to her.
I truly hope she believes she is happy with her new father figure boyfriend... and that she can continue to believe she has the real deal we once had.
She hasn't even been able to thank me for the Preakness t-shirts i picked up for her... then again she probably hasn't been home to check her mail either.
I guess everything was total bullshit. C'est la vie...
Wow. Maybe i had been giving her too much credit. Or myself.
I suppose i believed she was really in love with me. But if she was, she wouldn't be able to just 'delete' me from her life. So quickly. Just because someone showed her attention. Because he made her feel the way i made her feel. Someone who could make her tingle.
And it's funny how it works when relationships end. The best person in the relationship becomes the big loser... and the weak one gets the prize of getting to crawl into someone else's bed.
She's not in love. If she has any remnant of a soul remaining... what she did to me will eat away at her like a cancer. She gave up on us because the distance was making it hard... and because someone else showered her with affections who wasn't so far away.
And she cannot even tell me. She cannot bear to face me, to talk to me... it is easier if she just erases me from her life.
For now.
Being as close as we were for ten years... being as intimate as we were for the last three... wow, she really thinks that she's into something better now?
Or maybe it's that something better is into her.
I suppose it is good to learn how much she cares. How willing she is to endure any crisis. What 'true love' actually means to her.
I truly hope she believes she is happy with her new father figure boyfriend... and that she can continue to believe she has the real deal we once had.
She hasn't even been able to thank me for the Preakness t-shirts i picked up for her... then again she probably hasn't been home to check her mail either.
I guess everything was total bullshit. C'est la vie...